A muse called Morrissey

A muse called Morrissey

While reading Morrissey’s autobiography, it struck me that this lyrical virtuoso should lend his skills to struggling authors looking for catchy book titles. Don’t you think these songs would make great novels?

Because of my poor education
Children in pieces
Death at one’s elbow
Don’t make fun of daddy’s voice
Every day is like sunday
William it was really nothing
Hairdresser on fire
How soon is now?
It’s not your birthday anymore
Pregnant for the last time
Stop me if you think you’ve heard this before
Shakespeare’s Sister

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Always read the fine print*

Always read the fine print*

Plot: Frank has been in a serious car accident and he’s missing memories—of the people around him, of the history they share, and of how he came to be in the crash. All he remembers is that he is a lawyer who specializes in fine print, and as he narrates his story, he applies this expertise in the form of footnotes.*

Robert Glancy’s debut novel is likable and funny, just like the author. Here he is talking to us on our radio show about his journey from PR man to Bloomsbury author. If you like Nick Hornby and have an issue with lawyers you’ll love this book.

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Bruce Springsteen for President

Bruce Springsteen for President

This picture was taken last night at Bruce Springsteen’s epic show in Auckland, New Zealand. He opened with a rendition of Lorde’s ‘Royals’ before embarking on a set list which made those lucky enough to be there smile like drunken goons.

His version of ‘Born to Run’ made me laugh out loud it was that damn good. And that’s what surprised me most. I never expected to laugh at a Bruce gig. He drags willing punters on stage to play his guitar and dance with his band. He’s a star but he’s ain’t precious. He’s the likable neighbor who hit the big time and wants everyone to join the party.

By the time he finished the entire ‘Born in the USA’ album I wanted to bow to him as if he were some kind of Rock God sent from space. Which makes this keynote speech at SXSW even cooler. Yes it’s an hour long – yes you’ll love it.

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X-Treme School Holidays Kiwi style – Praying Mantis Vs Fly

X-Treme School holidays Kiwi style - Praying Mantis Vs Fly

It’s school holidays here in New Zealand. When drawing, playing soccer and Mine Craft have run their course, my young girls normally set about finding a new hobby. In this case one that involves death and mayhem.

Goodnight, Mr Fly.

Kids always find the rudest page

Kids always find the rudest page

And in The Dog That Ate The Bathroom it happens to be this page. Then again, I’m old and I still find it funny. (Click on image if you’d to see the ebook.)

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The Lorde of the literary world?

The Lorde of the literary world?

How cool. Tomorrow morning on Classic Hits Auckland (7.50am NZ time) we’ll be speaking with Samantha Shannon, the girl who began writing at age 15, before crafting The Bone Season at age 18. Lorde, what’s in the water these days?

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The little shop with a big attitude

 The little shop with a big attitude

In my children’s novel ‘Shot, Boom, Score’ the main character (Toby) often visits his grandma in her second-hand shop named ‘Junk and Disorderly.’ The inspiration for this came from a nearby shoe repair store, whose owners told banks on either side to bugger off when they wanted to bowl its premises. The grandma in my novel finds herself in a similar situation as told by Toby in chapter two:

Today I went to visit my grandma. She owns a shop on the main street in the middle of town called ‘Junk and Disorderly’. It sells really old things, like paintings and chairs and tables you normally only see in old photos. But she’s also got cool stuff, like a wind-up monkey with wheels instead of feet, and lots of medals from the war. There’s a medal in a locked cabinet no one is allowed to touch, not even me. It’s a shiny gold five-pointed star with a red-and-blue ribbon. It has a ‘GRI’ written on it in big curly writing, and ‘The African Star’ in eeny-weeny writing. Grandma told me the medal is worth a lot of money. Every time I visit I go straight to that cabinet and look at the medal. It’s almost my favourite thing in the shop, apart from the pinball machine with lots of girls with no clothes on.

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Ya flamin’ gallah!

Ya flamin' gallah!

I’ll admit, I’ve never watched an episode of Home and Away but Ray Meagher who plays Alf Stewart joined us this morning – and he’s a flamin’ legend. Slightly hungover, maybe. Hilarious, definitely. 26 years on the show, this boy might have a future.

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